Quietude

offense when you're on the defense

It’s been a little quiet over on this part of the ether webs. A few Mondays ago, I woke up with the feeling that Monday just kicked me in the face. I’m honestly not sure what happened outside of having a feeling of what the heck. And ever since then, it feels like I’m the horse in the race. None of this is to say that this sucks, but what I am saying is woah. I need a moment to breathe.

And all of that is just part of the human experience. What are we going to do? You could be living the most beautiful of lives—perfect in all that you consider perfect. You have the best job, the best friends, the best partner, the best house, the best hobbies—you could literally describe everything as perfect. But that doesn’t mean that you’re not going to get jostled around a little bit, right?

The universe is cute. She works in mysterious ways. She is there to keep us on our toes for sure. And in those moments, I personally first want to scream, and then I want to curl up into a little ball and just be with my own self. Again, to reiterate, I wasn’t upset or anything, it just felt like you are getting pushed forward before you can even get your bearings straight.

And what’s the best offense to a wtf kind of defense? Quietude, simplicity, and honestly just doing what needs to get done and being okay with that are homes that I come back to. It’s the idea that perfect doesn’t always have to be the goal. Isn’t that such a wonderful thing? To have a soft landing that just holds you close. It carries you to a place that just feels nurturing and whole. A place where you can just be yourself, and that enough is enough. You’re not trying to be the best, smartest, coolest, or anything. It’s just a place for you to be you. It’s a nice reminder that often times the things that we seek are just illusions of what we think is the truth.

The other day I was reading a few passages from the Ashtavakra Gita. I came across a few verses that really just drove this point home.

If you aspire after liberation, my child, shun the objects of the senses as poison and seek forgiveness, sincerity, kindness, contentment, and truth as nectar. 1:2

You are neither earth, nor water, nor fire, nor air, nor space. In order to attain liberation, know the Self as the witness of all these and as Consciousness itself. 1:3

Life doesn’t have to be so complicated. Can I rest in the notion that I am whole? Can I rest in the notion that everything is as it should be?

Man, that takes a load off, huh?

So, when you have those days that no matter what you’re doing, nothing is landing. Nothing is feeling like you can get ahead. Nothing is helping you get out of the line of site of the craziest Mondays (or any other day of the week for that matter), just go on the offense. Allow yourself to fall. Allow yourself to just be with your whole self.

Makes it feel like you can breathe again, right?

xx, n